No one ever talks about how a new baby can affect a marriage. Well, I'm telling you a new baby can put A LOT of stress on one. I have a wonderful husband, whom I love very much. We have been together for several years before we had our first child. I was not expecting how angry I could get at him over our child. And I'm sure he was just as angry at me. What causes all this? LACK OF SLEEP! We just aren't in control of our emotions when we do not get those 7-10 hours of sleep our bodies need on a daily basis.
When our twins arrived I wanted to avoid all that anger. We didn't need to add MORE stress to what we had in store for us. I had been recommended a book titled "Babyproofing your Marriage." It was a great read. I will say, it is slightly female biased, as it's written by all women, but they do have plenty for the men too. It really opened my eyes up to how my husband viewed things. My husband read it too (I made him.) And I immediately saw a difference in how we were acting together. We were no longer "keeping score." I was thanking him for emptying the dishwasher, instead of thinking, "He should, I've been nursing 2 babies all damn day AND recovering from a c-section." The book also discusses sex after baby. We had way more sex the first year after the babies, compared with the first year of my oldest. I think this book has a lot to do with that. And yes, it even talks about how to deal with grandparents.
I have a friend whose husband didn't want a 3rd child, because he didn't like the person she became with an infant! How funny is that? We mommies can get feisty on little to no sleep! But Daddy's can do a little to help Mommy get a little more sleep, and maybe Daddy can get a little more sex!
How did a new baby affect your marriage? Any tips for new moms?